"Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling and to make you stand in the presence of His glory blameless with great joy," Jude 24 NASB
Last night was my retirement party. I have officially retired from homeschooling. For 12 years I have carried the weight of my kids education. Of course every parent feels some responsibility for their children's education, but to the homeschooling parent it can sometimes feel like Atlas carrying the world on his shoulders. God has been pointing me to this verse for awhile to remind me that He has kept me from stumbling and that I stand in His presence blameless and the that great joy is available to me. Last night I had a chance to experience some of that great joy.
At some point I will explain why we chose to put the kids in school at this time, but for now I am just wrestling with the joy of having been faithful and the sadness that my kids will soon be spending more time outside my house than inside my house. For someone like me who is still getting up to speed on the range of emotions, this takes a lot of emotional energy to process. (Let's remember, I am a science teacher by trade. Got some of the logical Spock stuff going on.)
But last night was so good. I asked a few dear friends to put together a full steak dinner and even asked my husband and kids to prepare short thank you speeches for after dinner. I invited the people that have helped me on the journey so I could take a few minutes to thank them personally for their support and encouragement over the years. My husband also put together a slide show of the kids over those 12 years and it brought back wonderful memories.
I felt very loved, honored and appreciated by all that went into the party.
The party was my idea because I knew I needed my friend's help to celebrate what God has done, but to also to help me grieve. I grew to love homeschooling and spending so much time with my kids. In each of the kid's speeches, they talked about snuggling with mom as one of the things they will miss the most. My second daughter just stood up and cried. She could barely even talk and eventually I just stood up and hugged her and said "you can tell me the rest later". It was so beautiful.
Homeschooling Mom or Dad, you are doing such an important work in your children's lives. It goes far beyond the math and spelling tests. You literally have a front row seat in caring for your children's hearts. To be honest, there were many days that it was a bit tricky to be both teacher and mother. It can be a real balancing act, but you are still the one who can bless like no other and be blessed by them in return.
I asked for the party also because I needed to be thanked for so many years of hard labor. I think that's the spirit behind most retirement parties; a simple Thank You. But I also wanted to say thank you not only to my friends, but to my children. I ended the evening thanking each of my kids individually for the things that have taught me and how well they have loved me.
I hope you already know that homeschooling is a two way street. We love and pour our lives into our kids, but God is using them to love us too. I have learned so much from my kids. Important things like how to lighten up; love unconditionally, laugh more and give and get hugs daily. I'm glad they can all read and write and I am confident they are well prepared academically for public school. But who got the better end of the deal; them or me? The answer is both, and that is truly Another Homeschool Success Story.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Making Good Choices
Paris was amazing! Beautiful, romantic and perfect weather. It was an excellent choice for celebrating our 20th Anniversary. It felt so good to just be and not feel the need to do or be on the clock. My life, at this stage, is largely schedule keeper and chauffeur. In Paris, my husband handled all the travel arrangements and we simply did as we pleased when we pleased. It was a wonderful break from the rigors of running a household.
Of course, you don't go across the sea and leave your children for a week without returning with some gifts. So we brought back little gifts for each of the kids that we thought would bless them specifically. Sarah got a scarf and a compact with "Paris" on it. Rachel got a very large coffee mug for her milk and cookies addiction and some French chocolate. David got a ball cap with "Paris" on it, and John got wrist bands and playing cards. (with "Paris" on them; see the theme?)
Now some of you can already see the problem because one of those 4 kids only got one gift while the others all got 2 gifts. So the obvious question came out: "Is my gift the most expensive, Mom?".
A sense of fairness is buried deep in the heart of all God's children. I think this is what makes God's grace so difficult to understand. It doesn't seem fair that some are forgiven in the last hour while others walk with the Lord the majority of their lives and yet we all enter into the same rest at the end of it all. We want to know we are special, but the trap is trying to determine that by comparing ourselves to others. The truth is that we are special, wonderful and fearfully made. All God's works are wonderful and He wants us to know that full well. (Psalm 139)
So of course the answer was "Yes, your gift was the most expensive, David." And then the bickering ensued about who had gotten the best gift and was therefore the most loved child. I seem to remember the disciples (and their mom) asking Jesus this very same question in the gospels.
We eventually intervened with the sage wisdom of homeschool parents that are always looking for those teachable moments.
Mom: "You know, if buying gifts makes you guys fight, then we just need to stop buying you gifts."
David: "No, Mom. The gifts don't make us fight. We choose to fight, so buying us gifts is fine."
I was both delighted and disturbed at that exchange. They get it. We make choices about our responses to gifts and curses. Our perspective can change our interpretation of every circumstance. If God is good, then even the bad things have a purpose.
So in the end, I think my kids enjoyed getting the gifts and really missed us. That was evidenced by the way we all sat on the couch under a blanket and snuggled together shortly after returning. But I also think they just like to argue with each other too. Another Homeschool Success Story!
Of course, you don't go across the sea and leave your children for a week without returning with some gifts. So we brought back little gifts for each of the kids that we thought would bless them specifically. Sarah got a scarf and a compact with "Paris" on it. Rachel got a very large coffee mug for her milk and cookies addiction and some French chocolate. David got a ball cap with "Paris" on it, and John got wrist bands and playing cards. (with "Paris" on them; see the theme?)
Now some of you can already see the problem because one of those 4 kids only got one gift while the others all got 2 gifts. So the obvious question came out: "Is my gift the most expensive, Mom?".
A sense of fairness is buried deep in the heart of all God's children. I think this is what makes God's grace so difficult to understand. It doesn't seem fair that some are forgiven in the last hour while others walk with the Lord the majority of their lives and yet we all enter into the same rest at the end of it all. We want to know we are special, but the trap is trying to determine that by comparing ourselves to others. The truth is that we are special, wonderful and fearfully made. All God's works are wonderful and He wants us to know that full well. (Psalm 139)
So of course the answer was "Yes, your gift was the most expensive, David." And then the bickering ensued about who had gotten the best gift and was therefore the most loved child. I seem to remember the disciples (and their mom) asking Jesus this very same question in the gospels.
We eventually intervened with the sage wisdom of homeschool parents that are always looking for those teachable moments.
Mom: "You know, if buying gifts makes you guys fight, then we just need to stop buying you gifts."
David: "No, Mom. The gifts don't make us fight. We choose to fight, so buying us gifts is fine."
I was both delighted and disturbed at that exchange. They get it. We make choices about our responses to gifts and curses. Our perspective can change our interpretation of every circumstance. If God is good, then even the bad things have a purpose.
So in the end, I think my kids enjoyed getting the gifts and really missed us. That was evidenced by the way we all sat on the couch under a blanket and snuggled together shortly after returning. But I also think they just like to argue with each other too. Another Homeschool Success Story!
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Taking trips
So we leave for Paris tomorrow! I am very excited and thankful to get to spend an entire week in Paris with the man I love and nothing to do but enjoy each other. Thank you so much Grandma and Grandpa Replogle for coming to watch the kids. We are celebrating our 20th Anniversary!
But lets be honest, taking trips is exhausting. The prep work that goes into cleaning the house, arranging the details, writing up the sitter notes and then add the homeschool plan while you are away? At some point you really have to rethink whether or not to go.
But I say go you must. You need breaks from your kids, your house, sometimes your phone, your wonderful spouse and your life. Early on in homeschooling I realized how dark the month of February was for me. (and most people I know) It's towards the end of winter; you miss the sun and everyone knows that Christmas was not a break. So I started asking my husband for a personal vacation every Feb for 4 days, by myself. All I needed was someplace warm, sweet tea, a fast car with a great sound system and a new CD. I was fine to stay with friends, but I needed a chance to have all the expectations of life cease for awhile.
One year I went to TX and my favorite memory was hauling a lazy boy outdoors and falling asleep in the sun. It was wonderful.
What refreshes you friend? Make sure that gets on the to do list along with the shopping and changing the oil in the car. Your heart matters and we all need a break.
I told the kids we would put off their writing assignment until we return from Paris. My son lifted is hands towards heaven and exclaimed "Praise God!" Another Homeschool Success Story
But lets be honest, taking trips is exhausting. The prep work that goes into cleaning the house, arranging the details, writing up the sitter notes and then add the homeschool plan while you are away? At some point you really have to rethink whether or not to go.
But I say go you must. You need breaks from your kids, your house, sometimes your phone, your wonderful spouse and your life. Early on in homeschooling I realized how dark the month of February was for me. (and most people I know) It's towards the end of winter; you miss the sun and everyone knows that Christmas was not a break. So I started asking my husband for a personal vacation every Feb for 4 days, by myself. All I needed was someplace warm, sweet tea, a fast car with a great sound system and a new CD. I was fine to stay with friends, but I needed a chance to have all the expectations of life cease for awhile.
One year I went to TX and my favorite memory was hauling a lazy boy outdoors and falling asleep in the sun. It was wonderful.
What refreshes you friend? Make sure that gets on the to do list along with the shopping and changing the oil in the car. Your heart matters and we all need a break.
I told the kids we would put off their writing assignment until we return from Paris. My son lifted is hands towards heaven and exclaimed "Praise God!" Another Homeschool Success Story
Monday, May 16, 2011
Working where you live
This would have been helpful for me to understand on the front end of homeschooling. My job site is my own home. That means my house is like a construction site that is never really finished until the kids are out of school. If you stop and think about it, you wouldn't expect the guys re-roofing your house to clean the lawn to perfection every day at the end of work. They will do that when the job is done, but not during the process. They put away tools and what not, the big stuff, but in general it looks like a job site (aka messy).
Of course there is a difference between dirty and messy, but I could have used someone to just say "let it go". Let go of the dream that everything in this house will have a place while these kids are still here messing it up. Just enjoy those kids. Teach them to do chores and operate as a family, but lower the standards to the place where the house is not perfect but the family is at rest even in the clutter.
I am asked all the time, what will I do when the kids all go to school. I have some ideas and so does my husband (wink,wink,nudge,nudge,know what I mean), but what I tell my children is that I will probably just sit around and cry because I miss them so much. My daughter asked me the other day if I could also clean while I'm crying. Another Homeschool Success Story!
Of course there is a difference between dirty and messy, but I could have used someone to just say "let it go". Let go of the dream that everything in this house will have a place while these kids are still here messing it up. Just enjoy those kids. Teach them to do chores and operate as a family, but lower the standards to the place where the house is not perfect but the family is at rest even in the clutter.
I am asked all the time, what will I do when the kids all go to school. I have some ideas and so does my husband (wink,wink,nudge,nudge,know what I mean), but what I tell my children is that I will probably just sit around and cry because I miss them so much. My daughter asked me the other day if I could also clean while I'm crying. Another Homeschool Success Story!
Friday, May 13, 2011
Welcome Again
Welcome again! I lost my first two posts and had to recreate this thing. : (
My oldest daughter is finishing her freshman year. I have no idea how that happened. Joel and I think it has something to do with us feeding her all these years. (Make a note: if you feed them, they will grow)
When we started homeschooling our kids, we had dreams of protecting them from the mean ole world, sharing with them the love of Jesus and teaching them in half the time the public school takes. But what I've learned over these 12 years is that the mean ole world can not be stopped although perhaps delayed; that the love of Jesus can show up anywhere at anytime and that there is seriously nothing efficient about homeschooling.
As homeschoolers we love to brag about how it only takes 3 or so hours a day to teach our kids. Well, if you have really embraced homeschooling, you understand it is a lifestyle and attitude, not a time of the day.
You are the mom who counts the steps in spanish with your kids as you walk up them at the Museum on the free day of the year with a million other people around you.
You are the mom who throws out today's lesson plan because their is a hail storm outside and this is an excellent opportunity to discuss the science of weather.
You are the mom who snuggles with your kids and reads the entire Chronicles of Narnia series a third time because the kids just beg you to do it one more time.
Next month I will have my retirement party from homeschooling and I couldn't even write that last line without weeping. Next fall all the kids go to school. We have our reasons and God has been clear it is time. But I have learned so much from my kids and hopefully I've taught them some things along the way as well.
There is a good chance that my proudest moments as a homeschool mom will be hearing my kids argue about who gets to snuggle with me today when we read; or being corrected about the life cycle of the lunar moth; or the many times I clearly was making no progress at all in teaching them how to spell or learn their times tables and yet the Lord reminded me to be patient with them and myself and just enjoy them.
So this is where we start. Basically at the end, but looking back and ahead. Hopefully this will encourage you, support you on your journey of homeschooling your kids and help you remember that one of the greatest gifts is to enjoy others and in turn be enjoyed yourself.
My oldest daughter is finishing her freshman year. I have no idea how that happened. Joel and I think it has something to do with us feeding her all these years. (Make a note: if you feed them, they will grow)
When we started homeschooling our kids, we had dreams of protecting them from the mean ole world, sharing with them the love of Jesus and teaching them in half the time the public school takes. But what I've learned over these 12 years is that the mean ole world can not be stopped although perhaps delayed; that the love of Jesus can show up anywhere at anytime and that there is seriously nothing efficient about homeschooling.
As homeschoolers we love to brag about how it only takes 3 or so hours a day to teach our kids. Well, if you have really embraced homeschooling, you understand it is a lifestyle and attitude, not a time of the day.
You are the mom who counts the steps in spanish with your kids as you walk up them at the Museum on the free day of the year with a million other people around you.
You are the mom who throws out today's lesson plan because their is a hail storm outside and this is an excellent opportunity to discuss the science of weather.
You are the mom who snuggles with your kids and reads the entire Chronicles of Narnia series a third time because the kids just beg you to do it one more time.
Next month I will have my retirement party from homeschooling and I couldn't even write that last line without weeping. Next fall all the kids go to school. We have our reasons and God has been clear it is time. But I have learned so much from my kids and hopefully I've taught them some things along the way as well.
There is a good chance that my proudest moments as a homeschool mom will be hearing my kids argue about who gets to snuggle with me today when we read; or being corrected about the life cycle of the lunar moth; or the many times I clearly was making no progress at all in teaching them how to spell or learn their times tables and yet the Lord reminded me to be patient with them and myself and just enjoy them.
So this is where we start. Basically at the end, but looking back and ahead. Hopefully this will encourage you, support you on your journey of homeschooling your kids and help you remember that one of the greatest gifts is to enjoy others and in turn be enjoyed yourself.
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