I once got a "B"

I remember it well. All of life depended on getting straight A's in high school so I could go to college, get a job and make my life count. But no mater how I tried, I could not type fast enough in typing class to ever register an A grade. I worked so hard. I stayed after class and practiced whenever I could but I just could never turn the corner in my fluency of the old Selectric typewriter machine. (Yes, this was before computers.)

So I managed to go through all of high school with A's in every subject from choir, to ap chemistry to airplane building, but got one "B" in typing class. It was devastating. How could I go to college now? What University would take me?

Yes, this is all very dramatic, but it is actually how I felt and worse yet, so did my mother. The good news is that God still allowed me go to college. (A very good one I might add.) He allowed me to earn 2 degrees. He figured out a way for me to pay my college debt back within 2 years of graduating. (The key is to marry well!) I even got married, raised a family and have been greatly blessed, all in spite of getting a "B" in high school.

I think you get the point. Our God is bigger than the grades. We can ease up in this area a bit, both on us and our kids. I find homeschoolers have a strange relationship with grades. I loved that grades were not a big part of our homeschooling. It allowed the emphasis to be on the content, not just retaining the content until testing. Education can turn into fact retention very quickly. So it was freeing to just focus on the joy of learning.

But then there is that icky feeling always creeping in the back of your head. "Am I doing enough? Are they really learning anything?" The freedom seems to come at a price. Often when I was around other homeschool families, I found myself constantly comparing my school day to their school day. "Hmm, we don't seem to be doing latin derivatives like that family. Hmmm, I don't start my school day til 9am. They are at the table at 6am." If the goal had been to learn some new cool things to try, then the comparisons may have been useful. Instead I continually found myself just feeling like a failure.

This is the hard part about not having grades. We all want some form of a measuring stick and yet that is supposed to be a positive of homeschooling; less emphasis on grades and more on the joy of learning. So I needed to just let go and trust that my love for learning was enough for my kids. I also needed to rest in the idea that God would pick up the slack. From where I stand now, it is clear He has done just that.

So chill out! Stop comparing your school plan to everyone else's. They are your kids and you are their teacher. It will be unique to you and shouldn't look like anyone else anyway. Feel free to exchange ideas with other families, but hold them loosely and keep what you like and throw away what you don't. I would have died (or killed someone) if we had tried to be at the table every morning by 6am! Good for them. Sleep for me!

You're doing great mom (or dad). Look to Jesus to affirm the work of your hands. Give yourself some room to pursue the things that interest you. Don't miss that one of the things you teach your kids is the joy of learning. So just enjoy learning with them today.