Trusting Teenagers

So I've come to a conclusion. Trusting teenagers is like trusting God. At some point you just have to jump and be willing to be deceived. But what if I'm wrong? Then I might look like a chump at some point, but it doesn't really change the present. We have not been lax in teaching right and wrong and God's ways vs the worlds. They are smart and well educated kids. But now they have to decide how they want to live in light of the truth. They need room to mess up and decide if it's worth it. At some point, as a parent I need to take my hands off and see what they will do.

I told a friend recently that children are a good mirror but not a reflection of us. To the world and the church they may seem like a reflection. I have often made that mistake of just assuming something about a parent when I meet a kid. Sometimes I am in the ball park, but not always. They are people. Yes, they are apples and we are the apple trees, but we all make choices. The best choice I can make for them is to be here and let them be over there, wherever that might be. Another good choice I can make is to look into the mirror of my kids and continue to allow God to transform me. That might mean any number of things, but we do not serve our kids when all we do is serve our kids.

I am nearing the end of my grad school. I graduate in August and I really only have one formal class left. After that I am in a 14 week project and final capstone project. I've also started writing a book that I've had on my heart for many years. My hope is that is will offer hope and freedom and some laughs to some people in captivity. These are some of the gifts I offer my kids as they are now getting up from our family table and driving away in cars night after night.

I am also offering them a renewed focus on my marriage. It is crazy hard to be married, isn't it? Sadly even though we knew we were both bringing baggage into the marriage, we have even created more since being married. I think we've gotten rid of some it, but I'm not sure if we are unloading as fast as we are creating it still. But I have hope now and hope has been thin in different seasons.

I want my kids to know they will be ok, even when they make mistakes and that we will ok too, even when we make mistakes. Isn't that the definition of home? A place where love is strong and doesn't change with the wind. A place you can always come back to even when you really blow it and still find forgiveness. I know I longed for those things when I was a kid and it's what I want for my kids.

So I will stop analyzing every step the teenagers make and decide to trust them a bit more. I will also keep moving towards Jesus because I am more convinced than ever, that only He satisfies the ache in our souls. My hope is that my kids will be convinced of that as well, sooner than later.

And even though homeschooling feels like another lifetime at this point, watching them draw near to Jesus will be the best Homeschool Success Story ever!